Invitation Discrimination

Invitation Discrimination

                                     Frederika Menezes

Okay, I don’t normally do this – heck I never do this but now I have decided to give it a chance! If you haven’t figured out what I am on about, it’s writing this piece.
 So, what do I choose to write about on?

Read on friends of the written word –I daresay the answer shall be found, if indeed there was a question!

Since time in memorial man has in one way or another discriminated against his fellow human – be it friend or loved one, (yes love doesn’t always spare such things) if you thought otherwise, think again, and hard. 

Anyway, getting on – I was talking or rather listing those people man have discriminated against since human’s were aware of being capable of choice. A choice in behaving nicely or horrifically, to dress right or not dress at all, to eat good food or make all the wrong dietary choices (all these are valid reasons to put a thought in choosing) of course I know I could have left out a good many other reasons off the page but I am sure you will understand that I am not exactly trying to put together any kind of list here. Just trying to jot down a piece of a hopefully interesting read!

I actually witnessed a discrimination between two individuals once – it was a petty thing but person A would not let person B get the better of the situation – it being a seat in a bus. Not really well behaved and always  chewing gum – the reasons given by the person A for refusing to give person B a seat and standing the rest of the way to the stop (which turned out to be less than a few minutes away) or, taking another seat as soon as someone got out at a nearest stop.

I would have asked the question that’s been itching to be asked ever since this incident, how do you, A, know that the person you absolutely refused to give a seat to didn’t need it?! Was it because B was young …er than you, A? Was it solely based on appearance - did B give off an energetically lazy vibe? Did B’s gum chewing annoy you so much that you decided that if B remained standing the entire ride till it was time to get down, that the sound of gum chewing would float on the air above your head without disturbing your ears thereby making them bleed?? What?! Unfortunately, I was too far in the back of the bus to ask A any of these questions and A’s stop came up first anyway, so B really did win in the long run!
So much for A’s ugly looks and no no no behavior – ha! Would it have killed A to let B have a seat when the latter’s stop was still ways off? I am going with a big NO. How about you?

I suppose you are thinking of whether I really witnessed this incident – honestly, no I didn’t but I did make a point, I hope.

Very recently I discovered (and this is true) that a very large and affluent family decided to throw a birthday party to celebrate a fiftieth birthday of one of their many members. Now, the invitations were sent out verbally, via a phone call and email to the family’s closest friends and  other relations (of course these included close friends of the member whose birthday it was too! ) This family has a lot of friends who are close and doing very well professionally as well as personally so when one of the friends learnt of this party and that no invitation had been received by this person from the affluent family, the individual expected that the one member whose party it was to be would call or text or even email he invite personally but after waiting for days, nothing!  And the birthday bash was nearing its marked day. Bad, right?  Yes, I was thinking the same! I mean all through the years and every party, get together, picnics this person who now had no invitation, a sudden cast out now couldn’t attend this big bash or any future functions of this family – once out, you’re out – that’s how it is with certain social stupidity!
It made me wonder if maybe the person not given an invite was suddenly being viewed in a ‘snow white’s mirror’ and the oh so many pairs of eyes had begun to see the flaws in that person as being too horrible – never has an independent opinion, eats way too much at family gatherings without ever bringing over any kind of edible contribution, tells jokes that are inappropriate at such occasions, isn’t up to the mark fashion wise and so on.

Why the sudden annihilation of someone who was until very recently liked and loved by the family and its friends? The fair and very cool thing to do would have been to send the invite flaws be damned or if flaws must absolutely be ironed out, them point them out to the person and let the invited decide whether a big bash thrown by this affluent family is worth changing one’s entire character for just because these people chose to not include the close friend whom they have suddenly begun to view as not worthy of any further association.

My guess – it is the family’s loss – how often do we get to acknowledge that we are friends of fun people? And how many can say ‘oh that one is with the stuck up, I know that one!’ with a smile and a chuckle?

Well, I sincerely hope that party goes well – along with every other get together, picnic and what-have-you that family has in future.
chances are all will go smooth but let’s face it, a pebble thrown in on a very still surface of a pond is just what causes little waves of a big difference!